Page Notes
Episode published on Sunday 5th of June, 2016.
Sam pointed out to me that this does unfortunately mean that Mr. Pain's Guide to Covering up Your Secret Weapon Collection isn't foolproof.
Tagged:
D.P. Slymme,
Harry the Detulux Receptionist,
Inspector Jacques Russo,
Location - Detulux HQ,
Location - Paris, France,
Max Valerion,
Melvin Pratt the Environ-mental Protestor,
Sebastian Paine the CEO of Detulux
Comments
Transcript
Title - 98: "An Inspector Calls"
Subtitle - ix. "Russo's Trump Card"
(Still in the Detulux reception area, Russo removes a large photograph from his coat and presents it to Pain and Slymme. The photograph is of Pain, Ben and the Captain and appears to have been taken in secret from the cover of some bushes. Ben is holding a metal box and Pain has most of his back to the camera. Pain is wearing his usual white suit in the photograph.)
Russo: If ai am to bélieve your flimsy excuse propairly you claim zat zis white-zooted jen-tellman, also goéng by ze alias of "Mr. Pain", 'as 'ijaked your businez's namé et eez travelléng la globe tradéng eehlegal arms undair ze namé of "Detulux Incairpairated".
(Pain and Slymme look at each other for a moment, silent. This angers Russo.)
Russo: Well? Spit eet oot!
(Pain grins while Slymme rubs his chin with one hand while resting his arm on his other arm, contemplating what Russo has said.)
Paine: Sorry, Inspectah. Ahm not agreein' to anything without mah legal representative's say-so.
Slymme: ...Yes. Yes, we agree that what you have posited is in-line with our official statement on the matter [some rights reserved].
(Pain points at the photo accusingly and feigns anger.)
Paine: This good fer nuthin' fella has been toolin' around the globe sullyin' the fair name of mah company. Ah filed for his captuah and arrest years ago with the propah authorities. Ah tell ya'll, he makes me as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full o' rockin' chairs. An' what do ah get for all mah trubble?
(Pain clenches a fist, really chewing the scenery with his fake anger now.)
Paine: Policemen! On mah doorstep! Wantin' to search mah premises!
(Russo smiles wryly.)
Russo: Indeed. Zo you steehl maintain zat you do not know la jen-tellman een zis photograph, and zat 'é eez not associatéd wiv your businez?
Slymme: That is correct [some more rights reserved].
(Russo places the photograph back into his coat.)
Russo: How intairesteng!
(Bringing his hand out of his coat, Russo reveals another photograph. This time it is of Melvin the protestor, looking sad in his vest while holding a card with a serial number on it. It's a police photograph, presumably taken after he was arrested back in the first chapter. Russo grins, satisfaction on his face.)
Russo: Bécause zis jen-tellman, a cairtain Melvin Pratt, maintains zat 'e was haire a munth ago and ze white-zooted jen-tellman yelléd at 'im, shot a gun at 'im and léft 'im 'alf-nakéd 'andcufféd to a dumpstair!
(Slymme looks with concern at Pain, who momentarily seems taken aback and lost for words.)
Paine: Errrrr...
Episode tagline: The events Melvin claims happened were way back between episodes 12-18...but shh! Don't tell Inspector Russo that!
