Page Notes
Episode published on Sunday 23rd of October, 2016.
I had real fun coming up with more and more blatant things to put in the office to incriminate Pain. I think the mug's my favourite.
Snowball is based on my own cat, Snowy. Snowy is very much missed even after all this time but in many ways he still lives on via this webcomic.
Tagged:
D.P. Slymme,
Inspector Jacques Russo,
Location - Detulux HQ,
Location - Paris, France,
Max Valerion,
Sebastian Paine the CEO of Detulux,
Snowball the cat,
Uri Dankov
Comments
Transcript
Title - 105a: "An Inspector Calls"
Subtitle - xvi-1. "Office-cial Business"
(Paine and Slymme follow Russo up a few flights of stairs.)
Paine: Just up the stairs, Inspector! Mah office is the door in the middle, go on in!
(Pain turns to Slymme now Russo is out of earshot.)
Paine: Almost through it, mate. Just the fun and games in the warehouses to go!
Slymme: There's nothing incriminating in your office, is there?
(Pain's face drops. We see his office. There's a wall of pictures of Pain posing with various criminals. In one he's posing and smoking cigars with someone who looks suspiciously like an elderly Fidel Castro and in another he's stood in front of a big green mech smoking a cigar with two men; one has an eyepatch and a beard and the other has long grey hair and a moustache. This second man is making bunny ears with his hand behind Pain's head. In the third picture Pain's shaking hands with a tall bald man in a trenchcoat designed to obscure the lower half of his face, both are stood on the deck of an aircraft carrier in front of a fighter jet. Another wall features more compromising photographs. The first is Pain stood with the Captain and Mara in front of a banner labelled "black market arms faire". Mara is holding a machine gun, Pain is wearing a t-shirt with the slogan "I [HEART SYMBOL] SELLING GUNS" and the Captain has a big foam finger with "I [HEART SYMBOL] GUNS" on it. The second photograph shows Pain in front of a tank and several crates labelled "GUNS"; he's proudly holding two machine guns. The frame of the photo has a brass plate with the words "FIRST SALE" on it. There's paperwork all over Pain's desk for receipts and requests for shipments of guns. There's also a mug on his desk with the words "You don't have to be an ARMS DEALER to work here, but it helps!". Pain power-walks after Russo, panicked.)
Paine: SHIT SHIT SHIT FUCKING SHIT INSPECTOR!
(Russo walks into Pain's office. A white cat, Snowball, sleeps on the desk. Noticing Russo, it wakes up. It has two odd eyes: one blue, one yellow.)
Snowball: Miaow?
(Russo turns on his heel and storms out past Pain. Slymme gestures Russo towards the exit.)
Russo: Ai am leaveng. Zere eez a cat een zére. Ai am vairy allairgic.
Slymme: This way, Inspector!
(Pain rubs the back of his head while Slymme shows Russo down the stairs.)
Pain: Ffffffudging hell!
(Pain walks into his office and strokes the cat.)
Pain: Good cat!
Snowball: Mew!
(Pain swigs from his latest whiskey bottle with one hand while stroking the cat with the other.)
Pain: Glug glug glug
(Whiskey dribbles down his chin as he takes a breath, still smoothing the cat with one hand.)
Pain: *Gasp* Very good cat.
Episode tagline: Must suck to be allergic to cats. Because cats are the best.
