Page Notes
Episode published on Sunday 2nd of October, 2016.
Detulux Incorporated, while being predominantly populated by people hailing from the UK, I've always assumed to have a staff of all races and nations. Nothing brings people together better than smuggling weapons illegally. There's something you'll never hear anywhere else.
Artist's note: I still maintain that Pain's saying the most long-winded version of "it's a sport, like fencing" I have ever heard...
Tagged:
D.P. Slymme,
Inspector Jacques Russo,
Location - Detulux HQ,
Location - Paris, France,
Max Valerion,
Sebastian Paine the CEO of Detulux
Comments
Transcript
Title - 104: "An Inspector Calls"
Subtitle - xv. "Gymnasty"
(Pain shows Slymme and Russo into the cream-coloured gym. Some elite guards are stabbing training dummies with knives, while some regular henchmen hold the dummies in place. All four henchmen are muscular, the elite henchmen are wearing exercise versions of their usual uniforms; vest tops, jogging bottoms and trainers. The regular henchmen have removed their jackets and are also wearing trainers.)
Paine: This is our gymnasium, fer gettin' a sweat on and the like.
Russo: It's quite unusual fair a businez such as yurs to 'avé such complete facilitees.
Paine: We like to encourage healthy livin' as much as possible.
(Russo watches one of the elite henchmen stab a knife into the guts of one of the dummies.)
Russo: And "héahlthy liveng" includés stabbeng peoplé vicious-lee wiv combat knivés, does eet?
(Pain grins.)
Paine: Now, Inspector Russo, ah'll have you know that Detulux Incorporated is, above all, a company with its roots buried in the South of the good ol' U.S. of A!
Russo: Et?
Paine: Ahm sure you are aware that, next to guns, there's nothin' so fine as havin' a good ol' fashioned knife fight, youhearwhutahmsayin'?
(Russo crosses his arms, skeptical.)
Russo: You are telléng me zat eet eez company pulicy to practice stabbeng people?
(Pain feigns Southern rage.)
Paine: Now see heyah-
(Slymme interjects, a finger raised.)
Slymme: Casting aspersions on the practices of the company based on its point of origin could be classed as [once I've gotten through dressing it up with fancy complicated words], dare I say, racism?
Paine: What mah paid law monkey is not-so-subtley referrin' to is that mah boys like to get out some o' their aggression, and they're as mad as a hatter in the midday sun 'cus o' that fiend in the white suit spittin' on the values of mah company!
Russo: And "yur boys" presumab-lee comé from "ze Sooth" too?
Paine: Of course!
(One of the elite henchmen sneezes.)
Henchman 1: ACHOO!
Henchman 2: (handing over a handkerchief) Gezundheit, meine freunde!
Henchman 1: Merci, mon ami!
(Russo glares at Paine in disbelief, hands on his hips.)
Paine: ...Just not these two, obviously!
Episode tagline: The only gym I've ever trusted is a bottle of Gym Beam.
