Page Notes
Episode published on Sunday 31st of July, 2016.
The dartboard featuring a photograph of Pain was last seen all the way back in episode 11. I hadn't planned for it to be a major plot point back then so it was nice that it came into play later on in an unexpected way!
A couple of the partying henchmen are based on long-time supporters of the comic, Jason Mcfadden (a.k.a Jazon19) and a chap who goes by the alias of "DarkeAngel".
The third guy is wearing an "Eternal Man" t-shirt, which is a story in itself. I had originally envisioned that every 50 episodes of Detulux I would indulge in a series of one-off skits featuring random pop culture references, hence why episode 50 randomly goes off on a tangent. However, there was a several year gap between episode 50 and episode 100 and during that period the intentions behind the comic changed. Instead of a random series of skits, we added a nod to reaching 100 episodes in the form of the celebrating henchmen. As for the Eternal Man t-shirt, as part of the 50th episode shenanigans I found one of my earlier comic attempts and dissected it in a self-indulgent roast of my former art. If you really want to you can read it at the links below; I've omitted them from the Detulux archive just for the sake of pacing.
Eternal Man himself was a rather unremarkable super hero with the powers of invulnerability and the ability to take out goons using only his crotch.
Finally, one of the other henchmen might have been working in a convenience store in an alternate universe...
Tagged:
D.P. Slymme,
Inspector Jacques Russo,
Lei the Henchman,
Location - Detulux HQ,
Location - Paris, France,
Max Valerion,
Sebastian Paine the CEO of Detulux
Comments
Transcript
Title - 100: "An Inspector Calls"
Subtitle - xi. "Just Can't Get the Staff (Room to Yourself)"
(Pain leads Slymme and Russo into a blue room. There are sofas, tables and chairs. Two tables have henchmen sitting around them; the henchmen at one of these tables are wearing party hats. One doorway to the side is labelled "CANTEEN". On one wall is a dartboard and another wall features two vending machines, one of them for soda cans labelled "BLORCH".)
Paine: This he-yah is our quaint lil' staff room...
(Pain glares at the three guards on the nearest table. Seeing this, they suddenly drop what they are doing and hurry out past the three men.)
Henchman 1: Just remembered we're due back on duty!
Henchman 2: There's a corridor that needs patrolling!
Henchman 3: I'm not even supposed to be here today!
(Pain turns his attention to the other table, where the three henchmen in party hats are oblivious to what's going on. Along with the party hats there are a few floating balloons with the number "100" written on them. One henchman blows into a party blower. Pain turns to Russo.)
Paine: Er, jus' wait here, Inspector...
(Pain approaches the partying henchmen and addresses them just out of earshot of Russo.)
Pain: What are you doing?!
Henchman: We're celebrating 100 days of being at Detulux! Don't you think that's cause for celebration, Boss?
Pain: That's great, guys. It really is. But we're in the middle of something right now so can we celebrate later?
(The elite henchman at the table tucks into a slice of cake while another waves a full champagne glass.)
Henchman 2: Well there's always 150 to look forward to.
Henchman 3: Or even 200!
(Pain pushes all three towards the exit as a group.)
Pain: Great, great. Get out of here.
(Russo watches the henchmen leave.)
Russo: Vairy keen, yur men. Why do you need armed securitay, anywai?
Slymme: The Security Policies and Management Thereof are entirely at the disgression of Detulux Incorporated and its managers, staff, shareholders and associated stakeholders. There is absolutely no legal obligation to divulge the "Inner Workings" [full term definitions and details subject to change as required] beyond those outlined on the corporate website and other associated public outlets and interfaces [so keep your filthy French nose out of it].
Paine: Mah lawyer has a very good point but ah'll meet you halfway, Inspector!
(Pain leans in, tapping his nose conspiratorially and winking.)
Paine: Industrial epsionage! Our particular industry is prone to it, sadly.
(Russo remains skeptical.)
Russo: Lots of secrets tu keep, hmm?
Paine: Aww now, Inspector! You cut me to the quick!
(Pain places a hand on Russo's shoulder in a reassuring manner. Behind Pain and Russo, Slymme does a double-take as he notices a hand-made poster written in multi-coloured Comic Sans that reads "Practice Good Gun Safety!". It is signed "By Betty" and has hand-drawn guns all over it.)
Paine: Can ah get you a coffee while we're here? Perhaps a quick game of...
(Pain notices the photograph of him pinned to the dartboard, as seen previously back in episode 11.)
Paine: ...darts.
(Pain loses his composure momentarily, forgetting to keep character.)
Pain: What in the bloody hell-
(Slymme stamps heavily on his foot.)
Paine: -ow! I mean, I mean, ah mean how curious! It seems mah men have pinned up a pictuah of that white suited fella's face on the dartboard!
Russo: And why, prai tell, would zey do zat?
(Pain forgets to stay in-character again.)
Pain: I'm bloody wondering that myself mate-
(Slymme once again stamps on his foot under the guide of a "subtle nudge". Slymme now has a roll of paper hanging out of the top of his jacket, presumably the gun safety poster from the wall.)
Paine: Ahem! Well mah men are obviously so loyal to me that they hate the way this scoundrel's been sullyin' the fair name of our company.
(Russo removes the photograph from the dartboard.)
Russo: Would you mind if ai took zis photograph? It's a vairy clair likenéz of zé criminal.
(Pain, for the third time, forgets himself.)
Pain: Yeah, and when I catch the bastard who took it-
(Slymme kicks Pain in the shin, this time under the guise of "Lawyer-fu"! Pain sweats as he suppresses barely contained rage.)
Paine: -I'll shake the son of a gun by the hand for their loyalty! Shall we move on?
Episode tagline: BLORCH(TM) Soda is available in all proper dodgy supermarkets (seriously, the stuff tastes like paint thinner).
