Page Notes
Episode published on Sunday 7th of February, 2016.
I work in I.T., in case you couldn't tell from the episode tagline.
I should also probably link to episode 67 in case you're too lazy to use the episode selector above. It's back when Pain took a fancy to Lord Burdener's throne.
Tagged:
Ben Nevis,
The Captain,
Location - Detulux HQ,
Location - Paris, France,
Max Valerion,
Snowball the cat
Comments
Transcript
Title - 91: "An Inspector Calls"
Subtitle - ii. "Banana Surprise"
(Pain is still at his desk, hunched over it between two vast piles of paperwork, signing papers furiously. He suddenly angrily shoves all the paperwork off of his desk, waking up his sleeping cat in the process.)
Pain: ...Bugger it!
(Pain sticks his feet up on the desk, pouring a whiskey bottle into a squat glass while looking pleased with himself. His cat is less than impressed at being woken up. There's a knock at the door.)
Pain: I'm busy! Very hard at work!
Voice (through door): It's me. Ah've got a special delivery.
Pain: Oh, alright Ben.
(Pain swigs his whiskey and thinks back, his thoughts remembering an occasion where Ben was naked save for a very tight thong emblazened with the Scottish flag, Ben thrusting his pelvis enthusiastically.)
Pain: As long as it's not you naked wearing a banana hammock. Again.
(Ben emerges through the door, annoyance on his face.)
Ben: Och. You're never gonna lemme live that doon are yeh?
(Entering the room proper, it turns out he's carrying a thone-like chair. Pain is pleased, wearing the expression of a small boy when presented with an exciting new toy.)
Ben: Ah got yer fancy-dan office chair, the one from Spain*.
Narrator: *See Episode #67!
Pain: Oh goody!
(Pain regards the pile of papers scattered across the floor.)
Pain: By the way, some bastard's come in here and thrown all the staff wage slips on the floor. Could you ask the Captain to get someone to pick them up-
(As if on cue, the Captain walks in, arms casually behind his back. Pain smiles and opens his arms in geeting while Snowball the cat gets on with the very important job of licking himself.)
Captain: 'sup?
Pain: Speak of the Devil and he shall appear! Grab a seat, and while you're at it grab some wage slips! They're everywhere.
Captain: (nudging some of the fallen wage slips with his foot) As much as I'd like to clean up after one of your tantrums like you're some kinda five year old, we've actually got a bit of a situation.
Pain: What now? No bog roll in the gents?
Captain: H.G. sent me up. He's been frantically emailing you for the last hour. Didn't you get them?
(Sipping his whiskey with one hand, Pain points over to the corner with his other hand. Sitting against the wall is a badly smashed laptop. Ben, the Captain and Snowball regard the sight with mild disappointment.)
Pain: It was too slow. Got annoyed with it.
Episode tagline: Management cannot be expected to tolerate I.T. failures (even if it is their own fault for visiting all those dodgy websites in the first place, I mean, didn't you wonder where those 50+ "helpful" toolbars squatting in your browser came from in the first place, seriously?!?).
